Compliments and how we feel about them

“Wow you’re like really pretty!”

“Thank you!”


If you have seen Mean Girls, you know this is one of the most well known quotes from the movie. Regina compliments Cady, who takes it, says thanks you, and Regina sasses back in her ‘innocent way’

Now, this doesn’t happen in real life; unless of course you’re playing around with your friends and quoting the movie. Though in real life, we usually feel very uncomfortable when receiving a compliment; at least that’s the consensus we got from group this past Tuesday.

The question of the week was how do you take compliments. It’s a sore subject. I raised my hand first, eager to share.

“I love giving compliments, I want people to know how I feel about what they’re wearing or their smile or anything I like about them. I think it’s a nice thing to do, when you’re being honest about it. Receiving them though, is a whole different ball game. It’s not easy for me to take a compliment…I was raised that way, my mother never complimented me, the closest I got was when she was being sarcastic…it just was that way. I’ve gotten better at it though, I figure, ‘why would someone waste their breath if they didn’t mean it?’ So I’m getting there.”

I chose to go right, and we went around the room. Most answers were the same, people love giving compliments, but find it very difficult to take them.

One youth actually said that it was “Easier to take compliments from strangers than from my actual friends. I feel like they say it just to make me feel good and they don’t actually mean it. While strangers don’t know me and I feel they actually mean it.”

After we went around with that question, we had to give five top qualities we find attractive in another person.

“Eyes, definitely eyes!”

“I like butts, personality, honesty, intelligence, and boobs. Boobs are good.”

I don’t know why, but I really like nice hands. If you have nice hands I will freak out. Also, intelligence and maturity.”

A lot of youth had similar answers, and even after all of that went around, we had ONE more question.

“Now that we’ve gone through all of that, I want you to give 3 things you love about yourself.”

“My laugh, my eyes, and my ears.”

“I love that I’m smart, nice, and professional.”

“I don’t know…I guess I’m funny…”

That answer got a roaring response of, “You’re really nice too!” “You’re smart and outgoing!” “You have great taste in music!” and much more.

After everyone went around, the slight uncomfortable feeling that was in the air lifted, and everyone was reminded that we are all perfect just the way we are, and we all have something to offer others.



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